Meet Whiny McWhinypants

Abby has been sick all... week... long. On Saturday, our pediatrician said she had one infected ear. On Wednesday (after she and I both had about three hours of sleep AND we ran out of Motrin) the doctor said she had TWO infected ears.

What have I learned during this window of illness you ask?

That my middle name is not "patience."

I'm tired of wiping slick noses and squeezing cheeks to force medicine in an unwilling, clenched-jaw mouth... only to have it spewed back at me. I'm tired of staying up late and getting poked in the ribs ever time I doze off. I'm seriously thinking about changing my name to Daddy, since no one wants him when they're sick. (He pointed out to the girl that if she wasn't nice to Mommy and was stuck with him, well frankly, she's in the deep stuff with no paddle). I'm tired of the yogurt vs. ice cream argument and the 50 millionth load of sheets, pillows, towels and blankets. The hyperactivity of a child amped up on both antibiotics AND antihistamines is overwhelming.

But... what are you gonna do? She's sick and she needs her Mommy. So here I am, whining to YOU instead of locking myself in my room with my 30 Rock Season 3 DVD and a box of chocolate chip bunny grahams and letting Daddy (who is also sick) cope on his own.

School Life

Both kids are off to a rip-roaring start at school this year. We have reached Fall Break with the 3rd grade boy making A's and B's, though I could conduct the parent-teacher conference on autopilot at this point. "Great student, helpful, sweet, bright... but the daydreaming..." At which point I say, "We keep working on it. As long as he continues to make good grades we feel it is unnecessary to consider any type of medical intervention." Which is fine with his teachers. If I have to repeat the put on yours shoes/brush your teeth/comb your hair cycle 36 times everyday of every week for the foreseeable future, I might need medication myself.

The preschool darling is learning to read. That's right! I said, learning to read!! It helps that she has a Fall birthday and is one of the older kids in her class. With the exception of naptime, she adores school and her little schoolmates. Our afternoons are a litany of letter sounds as she works on this newfound reading talent. "M-m-mouse! B-b-book!"

There is a little girl in her class with some developmental challenges. I have struggled to explain what this means and to encourage my child to offer friendship and caring, but five is an age of little gray area. Trying to increase understanding of why the little girl still wears pull-ups, even though she is a "big girl" and why her favorite word is "NO!" and she is "mean" and not friendly has been a big challenge.

So it is Fall Break and the kids have the entire week out of school. We had planned to do the annual Fair bit tomorrow night, but there is a 100% chance of rain, so Fair night has been bumped back to Thursday. The grown-ups have hatched a plan to get there early, see the animals and craft exhibits, do a run-through of the rides and escape with our wallets and sanity somewhat intact before the larger crowd arrives. Fingers crossed.

P.S. Our Camera, our eighteen month old camera, has cracked under the pressure of use by clumsy me and even clumsier children. Oops. So no fair pictures this year. Unless I can figure out how to work the camera feature on my new, in-law purchased, phone. The one they included on their plan. Ask their SON if he got a free phone...

Mwaa ha ha!

Close Your Eyes

It's October. Hints of Fall are peeking at us. So close your eyes and picture this, remembering that I live in the deep south, and Fall is but a flash before a brief Winter and an early Spring.

Even so, the sun is high in the sky, the full moon hangs low at night. Leaves are edged with the beginnings of autumn color. Just a tiny touch of red, yellow, orange or brown. The barest hint of cool is in the evening breeze. Mums are beginning to dot the porches and store fronts and pumpkins are on display at the market. Today it has rained... slow and steady and a little cold... all day long. The cotton is budding in the fields. Puffs of white as far as you can see. The scent of freshly mown hay floats through an open window.

Mmmmm. Nice.

Hey! You can't read with your eyes closed, can you?

A Royal Summons

The little Miss will be turning FIVE soon. There are lots of big things associated with leaving the immature year four behind and edging into year five. Five, apparently, means that one is a "big girl" and not a baby anymore. Little does she know that she will always, always, always be my baby!



The Cinderella invitations have been sent, the goodie bags are full of sugary treats, the cleaning lady is coming today (good luck keeping the house clean for another 42 hours, right?), the party hats, plates, cups, and napkins are neatly stacked in the pantry, ice cream is in the freezer (good luck hanging onto that for another 42 hours too)... I think we're ready!

The birthday girl has been ready for weeks and weeks. She has been checking off her list and reminding us of things than need to be done and who she wants to invite... I love that she gets to enjoy the anticipation of the event as much as the event itself now. It's as much fun for me as for her I think. Though I am rather sick of spelling out the names of her friends so she can write them down for invites. We've done that about 50 times I reckon.

Music Love

Hello Again!

I had no intention of being gone this long, I promise!

Last Tuesday, the little one of the no-ordinary-illness-will-do had to be taken to the Emergency Room with a temperature of 104.8! She went to bed at 9 p.m. feeling fine and woke up a few hours later complaining of a headache. One touch to the forehead had me running for the thermometer and the motrin. The thermometer read 103.8 and the motrin came back up. So off we went to a very crowded waiting room. Luckily, the triage nurse got us back quickly and they immediately got to work on reducing the fever.

Our diagnosis? "Parainfluenza"... which is doctor-speak for not the flu, but not an ordinary cold either. This IS the child who was taken to the ER last year with a bacterial infection on her leg... so why would we expect something simple?

We've been playing catch-up ever since! Every washable item has been washed, the cleaning lady, though delayed a few days, has been round, and we are finally, finally, getting back in the groove.

The girl has been spoiled and now WANTS to be sick, so she can stay home and watch TV. And a mother who might commit an act of violence on the television if she hears the Dora the Explorer theme song one. more. time.

I've quickly been round to your places. So sorry I've missed out on your updates and news!

The Crazies

Debating whether or not I should have made that singular instead of plural. If we take a vote, I think I win the election for President of Crazyland. With that in mind I wonder if you've found my new address yet? I'm also debating whether I should just have made my blog private instead of starting a new one. Part of the convoluted thinking was that private blogs don't show up in updates and perhaps you would not know about all the exciting goings-on in my very exciting life and perhaps, just perhaps, you would forget me?

Do we ever really outgrow the need for validation?

I am currently toasting my insanity with a cold (regular, not diet) coke that has a strawberry floating in it. The kids created this cocktail. And I'm DRINKING it. See? I AM crazy. Come the Revolution, I don't think anyone is allowed to eat/drink kid-made food. Soozadoo has a theory about that.

The hectic pace of school days is adding wrinkles of thought train jumping that have my head spinning. Up before 7 a.m. Dress the kids, tell them one million times to brush their teeth, put on their shoes, don't forget the lunchbox.... pick up after the morning rush, work, home, play, laundry, supper, baths, homework, bedtime, school lunch prep, clean-up, start the dishwasher and another load of laundry.... repeat. I don't like repetition. It's mind-numbing. The whole "going postal" phenomenon is starting to make sense to me.

The girl endeavors to break up the monotony by introducing imaginary pet snakes to the family. Our snake's name is "Mr. Reggie" and he's a non-venomous rat snake. He eats rats. Just in case you couldn't figure it out on your own. The girl doesn't think anyone can figure that out.

Her barbie cell phone is constantly ringing with calls from her cousin, W. He is now the proud owner of an imaginary seahorse pool that dispenses pop-out drinks. To quote her side of this one-sided conversation, "Holy COW! That's AWESOME!!"

The head geek let them watch Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom and the girl has been telling all her friends that some people eat monkey brains and eyeball . Looks like I won't be on the mother-of-the-year ballot. Again.

The geek-in-training child is discussing shark sizes past and present (Megaladon vs. Great White, etc.) and bite pressures. "Do you think a Great White's bite is worse than a Hammerhead's? Did you know that Jaws was half a house long?!" He is trying to convince us that he is old enough to see Jaws without suffering any traumatic nightmares. I think that HE thinks it's more documentary than movie magic.

Today I let him dress himself. Though I had to bite through my lip when he walked out in a black Empire Strikes Back t-shirt and dark brown shorts. Black and brown? Together? Ohhhhh. I let him walk out the door because I knew allowing him to make a choice was more important than the assault that choice wreaked on my fashion sensibilities.

So if you don't find me, you might see an email in your inbox saying that my old blog is now private and you must sign in or have a password or something and schizophrenic me will have moved back to the old place without ever truly unpacking at the new one. But if you don't find me, you might never know just how truly insane I am. And now that you DO know, perhaps you won't want to come over and sit a spell?

Oh.

You already knew ?